Showing posts with label Queen Elizabeth II. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Queen Elizabeth II. Show all posts

Saturday, April 30, 2011

After The Wedding: The Ghost Of The Mad Duchess In Westminster Abbey Versus The Exorcists

And so it's done. The Royal Wedding went off without a hitch. No tripping down the aisle, no exes coming out of nowhere speaking up in objection, no paparazzi managing to sneak in the back door, and no sign of Sarah Ferguson crashing the party with a few Somali pirate warlords in attendance. Just one very typical thing: a wee bit of a problem getting that ring on the finger. It happens.

Rumor had it that Westminster Abbey had been the scene of an exorcism a couple of days before the wedding. I can now tell you that's the absolute truth. Anglican clergy did battle with the ghost of the mad Duchess of Windsor, to prevent her from making a scene. It seems Wallis Simpson still bears a grudge about her Eddie having to abdicate the throne back in the day.

Of course, after the wedding service was done and the guests had left the abbey, the clergyman in this clip went and did something unexpected. And very, very funny.

So, Prince William (or Wills, as some call him) is off the market. The world's most eligible bachelor falls to a new bearer. No, it's not Jack Black. He'd have to murder millions of other single men to get that title. Memo to Jack: maybe try cutting out the stoner slacker schtick. It's really annoying.

No, the title now belongs to Prince Harry, who seems to like looking over his shoulder at weddings and seeing the bride come down the aisle. What did he say to his brother? Some might say that he remarked, "Wait til you see that dress." Others might argue that he said, "Go for it, Wills." And I might suggest that he said, "Can I raise an objection just as a gag later on?"


Thursday, April 28, 2011

The Wedding Extravaganza Of The Epoch

And so the big day is finally upon us. As of this writing, in a little under twelve hours, Prince William will be marrying Kate Middleton, and the eyes of the world will be upon them.

Twelve hours of single life left for the both of them. A long, sleepless night, no doubt. Too late to back out of it now. Too late to just impulsively decide to elope.

Seeing as how William will one day be King of my home country (unless Harper manages to pull off his top secret plan to have himself crowned Emperor of North America, and no, that's not a joke), I thought I'd poke a little fun at the monarchy on the eve of the wedding. Oh, and by the way, I like the monarchy.

Of course the glaring eyes of the media will be there. In an ideal world, the Queen could have the dreck of the tabloid and entertainment reporters locked away in the Tower of London. They're a lower form of life then we regular homo sapiens, after all.

I'd even be willing to lend Inspector Lars Ulrich to the effort to take out the reporters. He hates them, you know, and he's not going to let a little thing like being a fictional character get in the way of kicking butt and taking names....

Without further ado, I give you... the Royal Family.



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