Friday, September 9, 2011

All Hail The Feline Overlords



They are our undisputed masters and mistresses. They have, since time immemorial, insinuated themselves into our lives, treating us as mere servants (which we are), demanding worship and fealty. They have shredded our furniture, taken over our households, and generally gone out of their way to remind us at every opportunity that they are the ultimate life form on the planet. And they know they can get away with it because we lowly humans will put up with anything to hear the sound of a purr. 

Yes, I'm speaking of the cat.


Let me point out straight off that I'm a cat person. I like their sensibility. I like their general attitude of disdain. They're an animal with lots of personality (most of the traits being directed in the me myself and I emphasis, of course). I've had cats most of my life at one point or another. As long as you show them the proper deference (calling them Your Majesty, Your Highness, or Your Supreme Majestrix will do), they'll put up with you, lower life form that you are. Consider it a favour.


They can astonish us with their agility, their ability to always land on their feet, how they can stride with dignity and poise across even the smallest of footholds...


Of course, accidents do happen....


And cats being cats... well, they tend to be territorial. If you've ever heard the unholy howl in the night that sounds like World War Three has broken out, well that's the cat from down the street who turned up in the back yard of your neighbour, whose resident feline overlord doesn't like seeing unwanted visitors turning up in the middle of the night. Or the day. Epic battles shall naturally ensue.


And then there's the relationship cats have with their fellow four legged critter, the dog. From time to time it's civil, of course. More often then not, though, there's a permanent state of tension. The dog, of course, either thinks it's a human being, or that human beings are gods. The cat, on the other hand, is absolutely certain that it's a god. Hostilities might crop up from time to time. It's to be expected.


We let them into our lives. They quickly establish themselves as the dominant lifeform in the house. I suspect the sheer cuteness of kitties is the starting point to that process. And soon enough, we find ourselves catering to the slightest whim of these furry deities and their innate curiousity.

We don't even whine when they've gone and shredded that nice item of clothing that we just bought for ourselves? Why not? Because... we know our place.

Besides, one purr and we'll forgive anything.


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